Chapter 1: Before
1. There once were two siblings. Together, they would play games, parody songs, and pull strange stunts. Competing, they were ferociously thoughtful and creative. When they learned respect, they found that they had already known it.
2. There once was an imp who dug a hole in his back yard, with help.
3. There once was a unicorn who could beat people at their own games1, and became a source of joy and wonder for it.
1. There once was a blind2 angel who played on Earth. The very sight of her opened3 doors 'twixt mind and Heaven.
2. There once was an architect who spun webs4 of thought. When the dust had settled, he found to his satisfaction that he had built this world, and he took his rightful place in its center.
3. There once was a bullfrog who was intelligent and analytical and also a Republican. When the universe performed an integrity check, he vanished.5
4. There once was a woman6 who was birthed, fully grown, from Buddha's7 head. She and her lessons8 became part of the soul of the student.
5. There once was a mystic who never roamed far from her hut. She tried to heal a wounded hawk, but could neither speak its language nor comprehend its needs, so she made an awful mess of it.
1. There once was a man who wished for sandwiches9 and a diamond10. He made his own sandwiches, and found his own diamond.
2. There once was a mermaid who hated the water. She swam expertly and believed, perhaps correctly, that she could not get about on dry land, so she stayed, loudly proclaiming her contempt for all things wet.
3. There once was a satyr who played expertly. His audience left for reasons unknown, so he reluctantly put down his pipes and took up bicycling.
4. There once was a priest who served the wrong god11. When he realized this, he walked away, and searched throughout purgatory until he found his own god elsewhere.
5. There once was a ghost which, though long dead, went through the motions of life. It wreaked much havoc in the land of the living in its attempt to maintain the illusion.
6. There once was a nightingale who grew up among pigeons, and so knew nothing of song. In her travels, she heard others' music, and gained her identity when she tried and discovered her own song.
7. There once was an enchanting vampiress who tried to keep pets. She was kind to each one until the day upon which she would flay it and drink its blood. The animals were easily entranced, so none ever bit back, and each was happy to be her next pet. Thus it was that she never needed to learn.
8. There once was a pixie who followed the path upon which he had been set. When he realized that he did not like its destination, he left it, but became lost in the woods, doomed to wander aimlessly12.
9. There once was an avatar who demonstrated this world's potential for greatness, beauty, and perfection, yet remained in search of these. The world's greatest blessings went with her, though they could scarce aid her.
1. Quotations:
43 | Manual: Appendix B: 2
2. Why do women prefer
assholes?
3. Quotations:
1 | The Book of Answers:
Morality: Footnote 5
4. Reality Web
5. Thwpp.
6. Quotations:
34
7. Manual: Enlightenment
8. Thoughts:
18 | Quotations: 37
9. Bill Watterson, There's Treasure Everywhere
pg. 44 | Facts: 19 | Facts: 3
10. Lifemate
11. Quotations:
31
12. Though not necessarily forever.
